I just got home last 2013 after Yolanda hit TACLOBAN my mission place. I was yet so happy being home and wanted to explore the things that i wanted to explore. Applying the things that I have learn from my mission. A year later, I felt being an RM is not easy . It takes a lot of effort to be able to remain the "missionary spirit" . I have been bash, persecuted many times of being an "RM" my uncle said that it was a mistake being a missionary and getting back into school seems like a crazy routine for him. I was crushed by what he said. Despite of that I was experiencing,I have the courageous attitude that's enough to be able to move on and press forward. I had callings in my ward. This has greatly blessed me indeed. I had so many weaknesses that I knew that being an "RM" is not a bases . I am not saying that i should have not gone on my mission but indeed it was a great help and even a blissful experience of seeing people's lives change. After a year of being home , i know I have a lot of things to learn. One night my mom said That people tend to say thing or commented that I needed to be more energetic, and trustworthy to be able to handed down a more fully great callings but it was not given to me because I am not showing to them what is expected of me being a "Returned Missionary" . These expectation sometimes affects me. I know the Lord give calling to people because he knows that they can give and entrust this work to them, not to impress people but to help them change lives .
I cannot afford to impress people . People might bash me of how i act but I know in my heart that I did my best . I am giving what I needed to give. I know i need to improve - I won't deny it as well. I know I sin and make mistakes because in spite that I am an RM I am a human too . Prone of mistakes and imperfection as well. I know I might not be the confident RM nor a not so Good teacher as well but for sure The Lord knows how the intents of my hearts is.
I know at some point too that these persecutions makes you more of how the Lord wanted you to be. He knows you can do it and He wants you to become strong daughter! He knows what you've been through and can definitely do more of what he Expected of you . I know that if I will just hold on to that Faith and Hope I can endure every persecution and trials that may go through my life . He knows my heart and intent ,that is the most important to me . He knows my capacity as well. The most important of all "HE LOVES ME and HE IS BOUND TO GIVE WHAT I NEEDED AS OF THIS MOMENT"
Hopefully that people who will read this might be able to understand that RM's are normal people too like you, trying to aim for perfection. They have heart and the service of the Lord is not an enjoyment time for them that you will just say " Para kang di RM" with all their heart , they serve the Lord Professionally, kindheartedly, and even the best of what they got. I am hopeful that we must understand each other's life. In these ways we may find joy and happiness as we help each one grow instead of bashing other's life. They most needed your support . Bashing them won't help them improve nor helping them achieve the Greatest capacity the Lord wanted for them. Why not aid them on what they really need . Love them, care for them and most importantly understand them. Remember that " You cannot judge their actions" .
